You did not want to. I know that, because nobody does.
You stood at your own window for a week first. You told yourself it was none of your business, that you might have got it wrong, that people in glass houses. You thought about what it would be like to be them, and have somebody ring up about you.
Then something happened that you could not stand at the window for. And you rang.
What you were afraid of
That they would find out it was you.
You can ask for your name to be kept from the family, and we will do everything we can to keep it. I will be honest: in a small street, people guess. They often guess wrong. But I will not tell you there is no risk, because you were brave enough to ring and you deserve a straight answer.
That the children would be taken away, and it would be your fault.
It is rare. Most calls, in my experience, end with a visit, a conversation, and some help the family can take or leave. And if a child did have to be moved to keep them safe, that would be because of what was happening to them, and not because of who noticed.
That you had got it wrong.
You might have. You rang anyway, which is what we need people to do. Nobody can be sure from a window.
What happened next
Somebody wrote down what you said, as you said it. They asked you what you had seen and heard, and when. If they were good, they asked what worried you most, and wrote that down too.
Then a group of people looked at it alongside anything else that was known. Often there is nothing else, and yours is the first word anybody has had. Sometimes yours is the third call that month, and the one that makes the picture clear.
Somebody may have visited the same day. It may have taken longer. You will probably never know which.
Why nobody rang you back
Because we are not allowed to tell you what we found. It is that family’s private life, and you would want the same if it were yours.
I know how that feels from your side. You did something hard and heard nothing. Then you saw them in the street the next week, looking just the same, and you wondered whether anybody had listened.
Somebody did. I cannot prove it to you. It is the most unsatisfying promise I make and I make it to a lot of people.
What you can still do
Ring again if you see something new. You are not being a nuisance. One call is a worry, and a second call gives us something to compare it with.
Say hello to the children. Know their names. Be the house where a ball can be fetched from the garden without a row.
Say hello to the parent as well, if you can manage it. People who are struggling are nearly always lonely, and it is possible to be worried about somebody’s children and lend them a ladder in the same week.
If you are reading this and you have not rung yet
The NSPCC helpline is 0808 800 5000. You can talk it through with somebody before you decide anything, and you do not have to give your name. If a child is in danger right now, it is 999.
You do not need to be certain. You only need to have noticed, and I can see that you have, because you have read all the way to here.
Maisie x
Next in the notebook: Do social workers steal babies?